$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery<\/title>\r\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A massive monument to sheer gravitational pull. Heavy, meaty, and it physically struggles to fit through standard door frames.\"\/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery\"\/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A massive monument to sheer gravitational pull.\"\/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"website\"\/>\r\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\"\/>\r\n<link href=\"https:\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css2?family=Permanent+Marker&family=Patrick+Hand&display=swap\" rel=\"stylesheet\"\/>\r\n<style>\r\n*,*::before,*::after{box-sizing:border-box;margin:0;padding:0}\r\n:root{\r\n --neon:#47ff62;\r\n --neon-rgb:71,255,98;\r\n --bg:#000;\r\n --card:#0d0d0d;\r\n --text:#fff;\r\n --text-dim:rgba(255,255,255,.75);\r\n --comic-radius:255px 15px 225px 15px \/ 15px 225px 15px 255px;\r\n --comic-border:4px solid var(--neon);\r\n --comic-shadow:8px 8px 0px var(--neon);\r\n --comic-shadow-sm:4px 4px 0px var(--neon);\r\n --font-heading:'Permanent Marker',cursive;\r\n --font-body:'Patrick Hand',cursive;\r\n}\r\nhtml{scroll-behavior:smooth}\r\nbody{background:var(--bg);color:var(--text);font-family:var(--font-body);overflow-x:hidden;line-height:1.6}\r\nh1,h2,h3,h4{font-family:var(--font-heading);line-height:1.2}\r\na{text-decoration:none;color:inherit}\r\nimg{max-width:100%;height:auto;display:block}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== UTILITIES ===== *\/\r\n.neon-text{color:var(--neon);text-shadow:0 0 10px rgba(var(--neon-rgb),.3)}\r\n.container{max-width:1200px;margin:0 auto;padding:0 1rem}\r\n.section-padding{padding:5rem 1rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== COMIC BOX ===== *\/\r\n.comic-box{\r\n border:var(--comic-border);\r\n border-radius:var(--comic-radius);\r\n box-shadow:var(--comic-shadow);\r\n background:var(--card);\r\n padding:1.5rem;\r\n transition:transform .3s ease,box-shadow .3s ease;\r\n}\r\n.comic-box:hover{transform:scale(1.02);box-shadow:12px 12px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n.comic-box-sm{\r\n border:var(--comic-border);\r\n border-radius:var(--comic-radius);\r\n box-shadow:var(--comic-shadow-sm);\r\n background:var(--card);\r\n padding:1rem 1.25rem;\r\n transition:transform .3s ease,box-shadow .3s ease;\r\n}\r\n.comic-box-sm:hover{transform:scale(1.02);box-shadow:6px 6px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n\r\n.tilt-left{transform:rotate(-1deg)}.tilt-left:hover{transform:rotate(-1deg) scale(1.02)}\r\n.tilt-right{transform:rotate(1deg)}.tilt-right:hover{transform:rotate(1deg) scale(1.02)}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== BUTTONS ===== *\/\r\n.btn-comic{\r\n font-family:var(--font-heading);\r\n border:var(--comic-border);\r\n border-radius:var(--comic-radius);\r\n box-shadow:var(--comic-shadow-sm);\r\n padding:.75rem 1.5rem;\r\n text-transform:uppercase;\r\n letter-spacing:.05em;\r\n transition:transform .15s ease,box-shadow .15s ease;\r\n cursor:pointer;\r\n font-size:1rem;\r\n display:inline-block;\r\n text-align:center;\r\n}\r\n.btn-comic:hover{transform:translate(-2px,-2px);box-shadow:10px 10px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n.btn-comic:active{transform:translate(2px,2px);box-shadow:2px 2px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n.btn-solid{background:var(--neon);color:#000}\r\n.btn-outline{background:transparent;color:var(--neon)}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== NAVBAR ===== *\/\r\n.navbar{\r\n position:fixed;top:0;left:0;right:0;z-index:100;\r\n display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:space-between;\r\n padding:1rem 1.5rem;\r\n background:rgba(0,0,0,.8);backdrop-filter:blur(12px);\r\n border-bottom:3px solid var(--neon);\r\n}\r\n.navbar-logo{font-family:var(--font-heading);font-size:1.75rem}\r\n.navbar-links{display:flex;gap:.75rem;align-items:center}\r\n.navbar .btn-comic{padding:.5rem 1rem;font-size:.85rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== HERO ===== *\/\r\n.hero{\r\n position:relative;min-height:100vh;display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;\r\n overflow:hidden;padding-top:5rem;\r\n}\r\n.hero video{position:absolute;inset:0;width:100%;height:100%;object-fit:cover}\r\n.hero-overlay{\r\n position:absolute;inset:0;\r\n background:linear-gradient(to bottom,rgba(0,0,0,.7) 0%,rgba(0,0,0,.6) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);\r\n}\r\n.hero-content{\r\n position:relative;z-index:2;text-align:center;max-width:720px;padding:0 1rem;\r\n animation:fadeInUp .8s ease-out;\r\n}\r\n.hero h1{font-size:clamp(3rem,8vw,6rem);margin-bottom:1rem}\r\n.hero p{font-size:clamp(1rem,2.5vw,1.35rem);color:var(--text-dim);margin-bottom:2.5rem;max-width:540px;margin-left:auto;margin-right:auto}\r\n.ca-box{\r\n display:inline-flex;align-items:center;gap:.75rem;cursor:pointer;\r\n word-break:break-all;font-size:clamp(.7rem,1.5vw,.95rem);\r\n}\r\n.ca-box svg{flex-shrink:0;width:20px;height:20px;color:var(--neon)}\r\n.ca-copied{color:var(--neon);font-size:.9rem;margin-top:.75rem;animation:fadeInUp .3s ease-out}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== GRID LAYOUTS ===== *\/\r\n.split{display:grid;grid-template-columns:1fr 1fr;gap:3rem;align-items:center}\r\n.three-col{display:grid;grid-template-columns:repeat(3,1fr);gap:2rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== SECTIONS ===== *\/\r\n.section-title{font-size:clamp(2rem,5vw,3.5rem);margin-bottom:1.5rem}\r\n.section-img{width:100%;max-width:420px;margin:0 auto}\r\n.anatomy-icon{width:clamp(160px,20vw,260px);margin:0 auto 2rem}\r\n.steps-list{display:flex;flex-direction:column;gap:1.25rem}\r\n.steps-list h3{font-family:var(--font-heading);margin-bottom:.25rem}\r\n.backitup-img{width:clamp(180px,25vw,320px);margin:0 auto 2rem}\r\n.backitup-content{max-width:720px;margin:0 auto;text-align:center}\r\n.backitup-btn{margin-top:2rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== DIAGNOSTICS ===== *\/\r\n.diagnostics-frame{height:600px;padding:0;overflow:hidden}\r\n.diagnostics-frame iframe{border:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:inherit}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== FOOTER ===== *\/\r\nfooter{border-top:3px solid var(--neon);padding:2.5rem 1rem;text-align:center}\r\nfooter p:first-child{font-family:var(--font-heading);font-size:1.1rem}\r\nfooter p:last-child{color:rgba(255,255,255,.4);font-size:.85rem;margin-top:.5rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== SCROLL REVEAL ===== *\/\r\n.reveal{opacity:0;transform:translateY(30px);transition:opacity .7s ease,transform .7s ease}\r\n.reveal.visible{opacity:1;transform:translateY(0)}\r\n.reveal.tilt-left.visible{transform:rotate(-1deg)}\r\n.reveal.tilt-right.visible{transform:rotate(1deg)}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== ANIMATIONS ===== *\/\r\n@keyframes fadeInUp{\r\n from{opacity:0;transform:translateY(20px)}\r\n to{opacity:1;transform:translateY(0)}\r\n}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== RESPONSIVE ===== *\/\r\n@media(max-width:768px){\r\n .split{grid-template-columns:1fr;gap:2rem}\r\n .three-col{grid-template-columns:1fr;gap:1.5rem}\r\n .section-padding{padding:3.5rem 1rem}\r\n .navbar{padding:.75rem 1rem}\r\n .navbar-logo{font-size:1.4rem}\r\n .buy-reverse .steps-col{order:2}\r\n .buy-reverse .img-col{order:1}\r\n .diagnostics-frame{height:400px}\r\n .comic-box{padding:1.25rem}\r\n}\r\n@media(min-width:769px){\r\n .buy-reverse .steps-col{order:1}\r\n .buy-reverse .img-col{order:2}\r\n}\r\n<\/style>\r\n<\/head>\r\n<body>\r\n\r\n\r\n<canvas id=\"particles\" style=\"position:fixed;inset:0;z-index:0;pointer-events:none;opacity:.6\"><\/canvas>\r\n\r\n\r\n<nav class=\"navbar\">\r\n <a href=\"#\" class=\"navbar-logo neon-text\">THICC<\/a>\r\n <div class=\"navbar-links\">\r\n <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" class=\"btn-comic btn-outline\">TWITTER<\/a>\r\n <a href=\"#buy\" class=\"btn-comic btn-solid\">BUY NOW<\/a>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/nav>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"hero\">\r\n <video autoplay muted loop playsinline>\r\n <source src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICC-BG.mp4\" type=\"video\/mp4\"\/>\r\n <\/video>\r\n <div class=\"hero-overlay\"><\/div>\r\n <div class=\"hero-content\">\r\n <h1 class=\"neon-text\">Heavy Machinery.<\/h1>\r\n <p>It's a massive ass. That is the entire pitch. Stop looking for deeper meaning.<\/p>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box ca-box tilt-right\" id=\"ca-box\" onclick=\"copyCA()\">\r\n <span class=\"neon-text\">CA: NULL<\/span>\r\n <svg id=\"copy-icon\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"2\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"><rect x=\"9\" y=\"9\" width=\"13\" height=\"13\" rx=\"2\"\/><path d=\"M5 15H4a2 2 0 0 1-2-2V4a2 2 0 0 1 2-2h9a2 2 0 0 1 2 2v1\"\/><\/svg>\r\n <svg id=\"check-icon\" style=\"display:none\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"2.5\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"><polyline points=\"20 6 9 17 4 12\"\/><\/svg>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div id=\"ca-msg\" class=\"ca-copied\" style=\"display:none\">Copied to clipboard!<\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\">\r\n <div class=\"container split\">\r\n <div class=\"reveal\" style=\"display:flex;justify-content:center\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICCASSET2-ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif\" alt=\"THICC asset\" class=\"section-img\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-right reveal\">\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text\">The Meat.<\/h2>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim);margin-bottom:1rem\">You are tired of flat, bony, uninspired garbage. We are too. THICC is a monument to sheer gravitational pull. It is heavy, it is meaty, and it physically struggles to fit through standard door frames.<\/p>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">We didn't overthink the development process. We simply kept adding more junk to the trunk until the rear suspension completely collapsed. It requires two seats on a commercial flight. Deal with it.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\" style=\"text-align:center\">\r\n <div class=\"container\">\r\n <div class=\"reveal\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICCICONDEX-ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif\" alt=\"THICC icon\" class=\"anatomy-icon\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text\">The Anatomy.<\/h2>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"three-col\" style=\"margin-top:2rem\">\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\" style=\"font-size:1.4rem;margin-bottom:.5rem\">Left Cheek<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Structurally sound. Built to withstand immense atmospheric pressure.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-right reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\" style=\"font-size:1.4rem;margin-bottom:.5rem\">Right Cheek<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Symmetrical to the left. Aerodynamically disastrous, but visually devastating.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\" style=\"font-size:1.4rem;margin-bottom:.5rem\">The Chasm<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">An absolute abyss. If you drop your car keys in there, do not try to retrieve them. They belong to the void now.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\">\r\n <div class=\"container\">\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text reveal\" style=\"text-align:center\">Live Diagnostics.<\/h2>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box diagnostics-frame reveal\">\r\n <iframe src=\"https:\/\/dexscreener.com\/solana?embed=1&theme=dark\" title=\"Dexscreener\"><\/iframe>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\" id=\"buy\">\r\n <div class=\"container split buy-reverse\">\r\n <div class=\"steps-col\">\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text reveal\">How to Grab $CHICC<\/h2>\r\n <div class=\"steps-list\">\r\n <div class=\"comic-box-sm tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\">1. Wallet<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Get a Solana wallet like Phantom. It's the only way to carry this much weight.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box-sm tilt-right reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\">2. SOL<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Load up on SOL. You need serious fuel to move this dump truck.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box-sm tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\">3. Swap for $THICC<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Hit Pump.fun or Raydium, paste the CA, and swap. Feel the tingle.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"img-col reveal\" style=\"display:flex;justify-content:center\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/Asset-11.png\" alt=\"THICC asset\" style=\"max-width:380px;width:100%\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\">\r\n <div class=\"backitup-content\">\r\n <div class=\"reveal\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICCASET1-ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif\" alt=\"THICC asset\" class=\"backitup-img\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text reveal\">Back It Up.<\/h2>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-left reveal\" style=\"margin-bottom:2rem\">\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Stop staring at the screen and start doing squats. You are either riding in the dump truck, or you are getting run over by it. Bring your own baby oil. Or don't. We honestly don't care. Just put on some sweatpants and drop it.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"reveal\">\r\n <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" class=\"btn-comic btn-solid\" style=\"font-size:1.15rem;padding:1rem 2.5rem\">JOIN COMMUNITY<\/a>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<footer>\r\n <p class=\"neon-text\">$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery. 2026.<\/p>\r\n <p>This is a meme. Not financial advice. Your cheeks, your responsibility.<\/p>\r\n<\/footer>\r\n\r\n<script>\r\n\/\/ ===== COPY CA =====\r\nfunction copyCA(){\r\n navigator.clipboard.writeText('THICCx89230482039482039482309482309482');\r\n document.getElementById('copy-icon').style.display='none';\r\n document.getElementById('check-icon').style.display='block';\r\n document.getElementById('ca-msg').style.display='block';\r\n setTimeout(()=>{\r\n document.getElementById('copy-icon').style.display='block';\r\n document.getElementById('check-icon').style.display='none';\r\n document.getElementById('ca-msg').style.display='none';\r\n },2000);\r\n}\r\n\r\n\/\/ ===== SCROLL REVEAL =====\r\nconst obs=new IntersectionObserver((entries)=>{\r\n entries.forEach(e=>{if(e.isIntersecting){e.target.classList.add('visible');obs.unobserve(e.target)}});\r\n},{threshold:0.12});\r\ndocument.querySelectorAll('.reveal').forEach(el=>obs.observe(el));\r\n\r\n\/\/ ===== PARTICLE CANVAS =====\r\n(function(){\r\n const c=document.getElementById('particles'),ctx=c.getContext('2d');\r\n let particles=[];\r\n function resize(){c.width=innerWidth;c.height=document.documentElement.scrollHeight}\r\n resize();window.addEventListener('resize',resize);\r\n for(let i=0;i<50;i++){\r\n particles.push({\r\n x:Math.random()*c.width,y:Math.random()*c.height,\r\n s:Math.random()*4+2,vx:(Math.random()-.5)*.3,vy:(Math.random()-.5)*.3,\r\n a:Math.random()*.25+.08\r\n });\r\n }\r\n function draw(){\r\n ctx.clearRect(0,0,c.width,c.height);\r\n for(const p of particles){\r\n ctx.fillStyle=`rgba(71,255,98,${p.a})`;\r\n ctx.fillRect(p.x,p.y,p.s,p.s);\r\n p.x+=p.vx;p.y+=p.vy;\r\n if(p.x<0||p.x>c.width)p.vx*=-1;\r\n if(p.y<0||p.y>c.height)p.vy*=-1;\r\n }\r\n requestAnimationFrame(draw);\r\n }\r\n draw();\r\n})();\r\n<\/script>\r\n<\/body>\r\n<\/html>\r\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery THICC TWITTER BUY NOW Heavy Machinery. It’s a massive ass. That is the entire pitch. Stop looking for deeper meaning. CA: NULL Copied to clipboard! The Meat. You are tired of flat, bony, uninspired garbage. We are too. THICC is a monument to sheer gravitational pull. It is heavy, it is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"elementor_canvas","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-8","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8\/revisions\/32"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}

\n\t\t\t\t

\n\t\t\t\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery<\/title>\r\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A massive monument to sheer gravitational pull. Heavy, meaty, and it physically struggles to fit through standard door frames.\"\/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery\"\/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A massive monument to sheer gravitational pull.\"\/>\r\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"website\"\/>\r\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\"\/>\r\n<link href=\"https:\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css2?family=Permanent+Marker&family=Patrick+Hand&display=swap\" rel=\"stylesheet\"\/>\r\n<style>\r\n*,*::before,*::after{box-sizing:border-box;margin:0;padding:0}\r\n:root{\r\n --neon:#47ff62;\r\n --neon-rgb:71,255,98;\r\n --bg:#000;\r\n --card:#0d0d0d;\r\n --text:#fff;\r\n --text-dim:rgba(255,255,255,.75);\r\n --comic-radius:255px 15px 225px 15px \/ 15px 225px 15px 255px;\r\n --comic-border:4px solid var(--neon);\r\n --comic-shadow:8px 8px 0px var(--neon);\r\n --comic-shadow-sm:4px 4px 0px var(--neon);\r\n --font-heading:'Permanent Marker',cursive;\r\n --font-body:'Patrick Hand',cursive;\r\n}\r\nhtml{scroll-behavior:smooth}\r\nbody{background:var(--bg);color:var(--text);font-family:var(--font-body);overflow-x:hidden;line-height:1.6}\r\nh1,h2,h3,h4{font-family:var(--font-heading);line-height:1.2}\r\na{text-decoration:none;color:inherit}\r\nimg{max-width:100%;height:auto;display:block}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== UTILITIES ===== *\/\r\n.neon-text{color:var(--neon);text-shadow:0 0 10px rgba(var(--neon-rgb),.3)}\r\n.container{max-width:1200px;margin:0 auto;padding:0 1rem}\r\n.section-padding{padding:5rem 1rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== COMIC BOX ===== *\/\r\n.comic-box{\r\n border:var(--comic-border);\r\n border-radius:var(--comic-radius);\r\n box-shadow:var(--comic-shadow);\r\n background:var(--card);\r\n padding:1.5rem;\r\n transition:transform .3s ease,box-shadow .3s ease;\r\n}\r\n.comic-box:hover{transform:scale(1.02);box-shadow:12px 12px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n.comic-box-sm{\r\n border:var(--comic-border);\r\n border-radius:var(--comic-radius);\r\n box-shadow:var(--comic-shadow-sm);\r\n background:var(--card);\r\n padding:1rem 1.25rem;\r\n transition:transform .3s ease,box-shadow .3s ease;\r\n}\r\n.comic-box-sm:hover{transform:scale(1.02);box-shadow:6px 6px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n\r\n.tilt-left{transform:rotate(-1deg)}.tilt-left:hover{transform:rotate(-1deg) scale(1.02)}\r\n.tilt-right{transform:rotate(1deg)}.tilt-right:hover{transform:rotate(1deg) scale(1.02)}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== BUTTONS ===== *\/\r\n.btn-comic{\r\n font-family:var(--font-heading);\r\n border:var(--comic-border);\r\n border-radius:var(--comic-radius);\r\n box-shadow:var(--comic-shadow-sm);\r\n padding:.75rem 1.5rem;\r\n text-transform:uppercase;\r\n letter-spacing:.05em;\r\n transition:transform .15s ease,box-shadow .15s ease;\r\n cursor:pointer;\r\n font-size:1rem;\r\n display:inline-block;\r\n text-align:center;\r\n}\r\n.btn-comic:hover{transform:translate(-2px,-2px);box-shadow:10px 10px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n.btn-comic:active{transform:translate(2px,2px);box-shadow:2px 2px 0px var(--neon)}\r\n.btn-solid{background:var(--neon);color:#000}\r\n.btn-outline{background:transparent;color:var(--neon)}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== NAVBAR ===== *\/\r\n.navbar{\r\n position:fixed;top:0;left:0;right:0;z-index:100;\r\n display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:space-between;\r\n padding:1rem 1.5rem;\r\n background:rgba(0,0,0,.8);backdrop-filter:blur(12px);\r\n border-bottom:3px solid var(--neon);\r\n}\r\n.navbar-logo{font-family:var(--font-heading);font-size:1.75rem}\r\n.navbar-links{display:flex;gap:.75rem;align-items:center}\r\n.navbar .btn-comic{padding:.5rem 1rem;font-size:.85rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== HERO ===== *\/\r\n.hero{\r\n position:relative;min-height:100vh;display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;\r\n overflow:hidden;padding-top:5rem;\r\n}\r\n.hero video{position:absolute;inset:0;width:100%;height:100%;object-fit:cover}\r\n.hero-overlay{\r\n position:absolute;inset:0;\r\n background:linear-gradient(to bottom,rgba(0,0,0,.7) 0%,rgba(0,0,0,.6) 50%,rgba(0,0,0,1) 100%);\r\n}\r\n.hero-content{\r\n position:relative;z-index:2;text-align:center;max-width:720px;padding:0 1rem;\r\n animation:fadeInUp .8s ease-out;\r\n}\r\n.hero h1{font-size:clamp(3rem,8vw,6rem);margin-bottom:1rem}\r\n.hero p{font-size:clamp(1rem,2.5vw,1.35rem);color:var(--text-dim);margin-bottom:2.5rem;max-width:540px;margin-left:auto;margin-right:auto}\r\n.ca-box{\r\n display:inline-flex;align-items:center;gap:.75rem;cursor:pointer;\r\n word-break:break-all;font-size:clamp(.7rem,1.5vw,.95rem);\r\n}\r\n.ca-box svg{flex-shrink:0;width:20px;height:20px;color:var(--neon)}\r\n.ca-copied{color:var(--neon);font-size:.9rem;margin-top:.75rem;animation:fadeInUp .3s ease-out}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== GRID LAYOUTS ===== *\/\r\n.split{display:grid;grid-template-columns:1fr 1fr;gap:3rem;align-items:center}\r\n.three-col{display:grid;grid-template-columns:repeat(3,1fr);gap:2rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== SECTIONS ===== *\/\r\n.section-title{font-size:clamp(2rem,5vw,3.5rem);margin-bottom:1.5rem}\r\n.section-img{width:100%;max-width:420px;margin:0 auto}\r\n.anatomy-icon{width:clamp(160px,20vw,260px);margin:0 auto 2rem}\r\n.steps-list{display:flex;flex-direction:column;gap:1.25rem}\r\n.steps-list h3{font-family:var(--font-heading);margin-bottom:.25rem}\r\n.backitup-img{width:clamp(180px,25vw,320px);margin:0 auto 2rem}\r\n.backitup-content{max-width:720px;margin:0 auto;text-align:center}\r\n.backitup-btn{margin-top:2rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== DIAGNOSTICS ===== *\/\r\n.diagnostics-frame{height:600px;padding:0;overflow:hidden}\r\n.diagnostics-frame iframe{border:0;width:100%;height:100%;border-radius:inherit}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== FOOTER ===== *\/\r\nfooter{border-top:3px solid var(--neon);padding:2.5rem 1rem;text-align:center}\r\nfooter p:first-child{font-family:var(--font-heading);font-size:1.1rem}\r\nfooter p:last-child{color:rgba(255,255,255,.4);font-size:.85rem;margin-top:.5rem}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== SCROLL REVEAL ===== *\/\r\n.reveal{opacity:0;transform:translateY(30px);transition:opacity .7s ease,transform .7s ease}\r\n.reveal.visible{opacity:1;transform:translateY(0)}\r\n.reveal.tilt-left.visible{transform:rotate(-1deg)}\r\n.reveal.tilt-right.visible{transform:rotate(1deg)}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== ANIMATIONS ===== *\/\r\n@keyframes fadeInUp{\r\n from{opacity:0;transform:translateY(20px)}\r\n to{opacity:1;transform:translateY(0)}\r\n}\r\n\r\n\/* ===== RESPONSIVE ===== *\/\r\n@media(max-width:768px){\r\n .split{grid-template-columns:1fr;gap:2rem}\r\n .three-col{grid-template-columns:1fr;gap:1.5rem}\r\n .section-padding{padding:3.5rem 1rem}\r\n .navbar{padding:.75rem 1rem}\r\n .navbar-logo{font-size:1.4rem}\r\n .buy-reverse .steps-col{order:2}\r\n .buy-reverse .img-col{order:1}\r\n .diagnostics-frame{height:400px}\r\n .comic-box{padding:1.25rem}\r\n}\r\n@media(min-width:769px){\r\n .buy-reverse .steps-col{order:1}\r\n .buy-reverse .img-col{order:2}\r\n}\r\n<\/style>\r\n<\/head>\r\n<body>\r\n\r\n\r\n<canvas id=\"particles\" style=\"position:fixed;inset:0;z-index:0;pointer-events:none;opacity:.6\"><\/canvas>\r\n\r\n\r\n<nav class=\"navbar\">\r\n <a href=\"#\" class=\"navbar-logo neon-text\">THICC<\/a>\r\n <div class=\"navbar-links\">\r\n <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" class=\"btn-comic btn-outline\">TWITTER<\/a>\r\n <a href=\"#buy\" class=\"btn-comic btn-solid\">BUY NOW<\/a>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/nav>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"hero\">\r\n <video autoplay muted loop playsinline>\r\n <source src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICC-BG.mp4\" type=\"video\/mp4\"\/>\r\n <\/video>\r\n <div class=\"hero-overlay\"><\/div>\r\n <div class=\"hero-content\">\r\n <h1 class=\"neon-text\">Heavy Machinery.<\/h1>\r\n <p>It's a massive ass. That is the entire pitch. Stop looking for deeper meaning.<\/p>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box ca-box tilt-right\" id=\"ca-box\" onclick=\"copyCA()\">\r\n <span class=\"neon-text\">CA: NULL<\/span>\r\n <svg id=\"copy-icon\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"2\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"><rect x=\"9\" y=\"9\" width=\"13\" height=\"13\" rx=\"2\"\/><path d=\"M5 15H4a2 2 0 0 1-2-2V4a2 2 0 0 1 2-2h9a2 2 0 0 1 2 2v1\"\/><\/svg>\r\n <svg id=\"check-icon\" style=\"display:none\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"2.5\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"><polyline points=\"20 6 9 17 4 12\"\/><\/svg>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div id=\"ca-msg\" class=\"ca-copied\" style=\"display:none\">Copied to clipboard!<\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\">\r\n <div class=\"container split\">\r\n <div class=\"reveal\" style=\"display:flex;justify-content:center\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICCASSET2-ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif\" alt=\"THICC asset\" class=\"section-img\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-right reveal\">\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text\">The Meat.<\/h2>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim);margin-bottom:1rem\">You are tired of flat, bony, uninspired garbage. We are too. THICC is a monument to sheer gravitational pull. It is heavy, it is meaty, and it physically struggles to fit through standard door frames.<\/p>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">We didn't overthink the development process. We simply kept adding more junk to the trunk until the rear suspension completely collapsed. It requires two seats on a commercial flight. Deal with it.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\" style=\"text-align:center\">\r\n <div class=\"container\">\r\n <div class=\"reveal\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICCICONDEX-ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif\" alt=\"THICC icon\" class=\"anatomy-icon\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text\">The Anatomy.<\/h2>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"three-col\" style=\"margin-top:2rem\">\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\" style=\"font-size:1.4rem;margin-bottom:.5rem\">Left Cheek<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Structurally sound. Built to withstand immense atmospheric pressure.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-right reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\" style=\"font-size:1.4rem;margin-bottom:.5rem\">Right Cheek<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Symmetrical to the left. Aerodynamically disastrous, but visually devastating.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\" style=\"font-size:1.4rem;margin-bottom:.5rem\">The Chasm<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">An absolute abyss. If you drop your car keys in there, do not try to retrieve them. They belong to the void now.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\">\r\n <div class=\"container\">\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text reveal\" style=\"text-align:center\">Live Diagnostics.<\/h2>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box diagnostics-frame reveal\">\r\n <iframe src=\"https:\/\/dexscreener.com\/solana?embed=1&theme=dark\" title=\"Dexscreener\"><\/iframe>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\" id=\"buy\">\r\n <div class=\"container split buy-reverse\">\r\n <div class=\"steps-col\">\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text reveal\">How to Grab $CHICC<\/h2>\r\n <div class=\"steps-list\">\r\n <div class=\"comic-box-sm tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\">1. Wallet<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Get a Solana wallet like Phantom. It's the only way to carry this much weight.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box-sm tilt-right reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\">2. SOL<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Load up on SOL. You need serious fuel to move this dump truck.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box-sm tilt-left reveal\">\r\n <h3 class=\"neon-text\">3. Swap for $THICC<\/h3>\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Hit Pump.fun or Raydium, paste the CA, and swap. Feel the tingle.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"img-col reveal\" style=\"display:flex;justify-content:center\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/Asset-11.png\" alt=\"THICC asset\" style=\"max-width:380px;width:100%\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<section class=\"section-padding\">\r\n <div class=\"backitup-content\">\r\n <div class=\"reveal\">\r\n <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/thiccass.fun\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/THICCASET1-ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif\" alt=\"THICC asset\" class=\"backitup-img\" loading=\"lazy\"\/>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <h2 class=\"section-title neon-text reveal\">Back It Up.<\/h2>\r\n <div class=\"comic-box tilt-left reveal\" style=\"margin-bottom:2rem\">\r\n <p style=\"color:var(--text-dim)\">Stop staring at the screen and start doing squats. You are either riding in the dump truck, or you are getting run over by it. Bring your own baby oil. Or don't. We honestly don't care. Just put on some sweatpants and drop it.<\/p>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <div class=\"reveal\">\r\n <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" class=\"btn-comic btn-solid\" style=\"font-size:1.15rem;padding:1rem 2.5rem\">JOIN COMMUNITY<\/a>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/section>\r\n\r\n\r\n<footer>\r\n <p class=\"neon-text\">$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery. 2026.<\/p>\r\n <p>This is a meme. Not financial advice. Your cheeks, your responsibility.<\/p>\r\n<\/footer>\r\n\r\n<script>\r\n\/\/ ===== COPY CA =====\r\nfunction copyCA(){\r\n navigator.clipboard.writeText('THICCx89230482039482039482309482309482');\r\n document.getElementById('copy-icon').style.display='none';\r\n document.getElementById('check-icon').style.display='block';\r\n document.getElementById('ca-msg').style.display='block';\r\n setTimeout(()=>{\r\n document.getElementById('copy-icon').style.display='block';\r\n document.getElementById('check-icon').style.display='none';\r\n document.getElementById('ca-msg').style.display='none';\r\n },2000);\r\n}\r\n\r\n\/\/ ===== SCROLL REVEAL =====\r\nconst obs=new IntersectionObserver((entries)=>{\r\n entries.forEach(e=>{if(e.isIntersecting){e.target.classList.add('visible');obs.unobserve(e.target)}});\r\n},{threshold:0.12});\r\ndocument.querySelectorAll('.reveal').forEach(el=>obs.observe(el));\r\n\r\n\/\/ ===== PARTICLE CANVAS =====\r\n(function(){\r\n const c=document.getElementById('particles'),ctx=c.getContext('2d');\r\n let particles=[];\r\n function resize(){c.width=innerWidth;c.height=document.documentElement.scrollHeight}\r\n resize();window.addEventListener('resize',resize);\r\n for(let i=0;i<50;i++){\r\n particles.push({\r\n x:Math.random()*c.width,y:Math.random()*c.height,\r\n s:Math.random()*4+2,vx:(Math.random()-.5)*.3,vy:(Math.random()-.5)*.3,\r\n a:Math.random()*.25+.08\r\n });\r\n }\r\n function draw(){\r\n ctx.clearRect(0,0,c.width,c.height);\r\n for(const p of particles){\r\n ctx.fillStyle=`rgba(71,255,98,${p.a})`;\r\n ctx.fillRect(p.x,p.y,p.s,p.s);\r\n p.x+=p.vx;p.y+=p.vy;\r\n if(p.x<0||p.x>c.width)p.vx*=-1;\r\n if(p.y<0||p.y>c.height)p.vy*=-1;\r\n }\r\n requestAnimationFrame(draw);\r\n }\r\n draw();\r\n})();\r\n<\/script>\r\n<\/body>\r\n<\/html>\r\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>$THICC \u2014 Heavy Machinery THICC TWITTER BUY NOW Heavy Machinery. It’s a massive ass. That is the entire pitch. Stop looking for deeper meaning. CA: NULL Copied to clipboard! The Meat. You are tired of flat, bony, uninspired garbage. We are too. THICC is a monument to sheer gravitational pull. It is heavy, it is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"elementor_canvas","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-8","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32,"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8\/revisions\/32"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thiccass.fun\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}